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southern water tribe

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southern water tribe

Postby kingofomashu » Sat Aug 29, 2009 5:03 am

after the war katara dissided to vist hama to ask if there were any young water benders who could still be alive from the south pole she said yea ill tell u who they r if u take me back to the south pole katara said okay hama looked in her old prison she said there all in one prison place i rember where it was too hama and katara took appa to the prison in there there was only 3 pepole liveing when katara and hama entered everyone looked sad then they looked who it was and all smiled and said hama she said how are u doing do u know there is only one water bender young enoght to counitnue the southern ways they said who she pointed at katara with a smile then hama spit and turned it into ice and broke the 3 southerrn water benders free then aang took katara back to the south pole to rebulid kanya went back to the north pole with pakku and katara even made a prisson only for azula
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Re: southern water tribe

Postby Tera253 » Sat Aug 29, 2009 5:37 am

Alrighty...

welcome, kingofomashu, to the wonderful world of Fanfiction.
I recommend reading a little of this thread for some more pointers.

grammar and spelling are important as well though. Try running this through a Word Processor to get some of the kinks out.

But what a good story needs is a prologue. Give the readers a setting--something that they can use to create a mental image in their heads about what is going on.

Here is a description of my "Southern Water Tribe" that, although is not used in the actual series, it gives a vivid idea of what the Southern Water Tribe is like at the setting of my story.

After nearly becoming extinct almost 1300 years ago, it was brought back to life when Katara of old singlehandedly revolutionized the area, and went around with the help of others, founding several cities which grew and flourished with the times. Moreover, since the next Avatar Incarnate that lived after the 100-Year-War was from the Water Tribes (albeit the Northern Water Tribe), she too helped strengthen the Water Tribes, particularly the, at the time, weak and somewhat vulnerable Southern Water Tribe. Now, it is a huge, invulnerable fortress-type region, and is the only non-neutral place in the world where forces of The Order of the Avatar Slayer are very few in number. As a result, many battles are started here, as The Order is determined to get its forces in good numbers there. So far, however, they have been unsuccessful, and the Southern Water Tribe has resisted being overthrown for over 1200 years.

And of course, explain things. How did so and so do such and such a thing?
How did the SWT become the way it did? be sure to explain it =)
here's my example.

The reason for the modern Southern Water Tribe's "invulnerability" is the efforts of Katara of old, Fire Lady Sanaki Li Chan, Avatar Kai Serenes II, and her successor, Avatar Kada Dao Le. After the end of the 100-Year War, Katara returned to the Southern Water Tribe and helped dramatically in rebuilding and restoring it. Moreover, it was one of Avatar Kai's great projects during her reign, and within 5 years of her mastering the elements, the Southern Water Tribe was thriving. Ever since their near-extinction, the Southern Water Tribe became a more defensive nation, devising ways to keeps its borders safe and free from enemy rule. Additionally, they were 'compensated' in a way by the Fire Nation, which, under Sanaki's rule, was relieved that the Water Tribes did not want to exact revenge on the Fire Nation itself. This was a major step in the journey towards international peace, and because of the right leaders, it worked.

granted, never copy another person's work. Jut my advice being, try to create something that readers can enjoy reading, and that they can see vividly in their minds. it makes a more lasting impression, and can be helpful in bringing in readers.

~Tera~
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Rule 2: If you ever think I am wrong, refer to Rule 1.

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